Monday, July 16, 2012

Disappointed

How can one just go back on his/her words just like tat? I always thought it was one thing but ended up like another. Disappointed. It was agreed upon. It wasn't one sided.

Ppl change all the time. Just didn't think it would be so with this person.

Looks like this will not be the only matter. Sigh. Can't help but feel like it is all a lie.

Feel cheated. Damn.

Friday, July 6, 2012

Hard disk crashed

I should have learnt my lesson. I really should kick my ass for being stubborn. Why didn't I buy that bloody hard disk and store all my stuff in there?

Bloody laptop. U are new. I have treated u with reasonable care. Did u have to fail me so soon? Did u really have to? I even cleaned up my desktop and arranged all the stuff. Sigh.

Thanks YQ for trying to help. Sorry to have taken so much of ur time and to have u go hungry...

I am just plain unlucky.

I need to sleep. Sleep my sorrows away...

Monday, July 2, 2012

Yet another day

So the weekend went by in a flash. It's a work day again tmrw. Wonder if it is normal to feel like shit the nite before a work week? All the time?

I have to admit I have slacken. I have taken a step back and I'm not working as hard as before. I am very far behind my marking and I really need to buck up.

This week I am going to mark. Like really mark. I need to.

Sometimes I feel stifled. Stifled and bogged down with so many things, responsibilities and duties. When did life become so hard? It's way harder then before. There's pressure from everywhere.

I aim to please. I work my ass off to make ppl happy where possible. I try to lead by example. I try.

But I'm tired. F**king tired. I dun get to sleep properly. It's my fault. Always my fault. Do I look like im lazing ard not doing anything? Do I give the impression that I'm always skiving? Do I? Seriously?

Who can understand my pain? Yes, she is worth all the sleep I've lost. Yes, she is worth all that I'm giving up for. But I am only human. A human who needs sleep. I'm really suffering from the lack of sleep. I feel my bones shrinking, my teeth softening, my skin degenerating, my eyes losing it's sparkle and I'm slowly losing the ability to smile, to laugh, to look at the brighter side of things.

Why did no one tell me being a parent could be so tiring? Again, it seems like it's my own fault i'm so tired. Guess I got no right to complain then.

Well then, good nite world. Let's see how much sleep will I be getting tonight. Wonder if I'll be lucky?